Yeah, I'm actively trying to avoid it too. That's why I mention it. I wonder if it'd be worth it if you casually mentioned to them that you know that I know what they're up to?
Definitely go for it with Bill. Maybe don't bother with Lark, he's way more territorial but also a lot more, like, intuitive. He already kind of knows.
Well. Are you a member of the fun trauma club?
[He asks, because;]
I'd like to have someone to sit with but I don't want to waste your time.
[Dillon hates - making it about him, but he also thinks, maybe, the way Quentin says waste your time, the way he said I never really connected with people - maybe it's right to share a little more, group or not.]
I almost threw up last month when Odd made me a home-cooked breakfast. We talked before about - people that are real, in other worlds? We had a Hannibal Lecter on the ship, for a while. He had me for - most of a month. With my powers locked down just enough that he could do almost anything and I'd survive to feel it.
So.
I already promised Alec I'd go. But if you wanted - separate spaces, I don't know. I'd have skipped some for you.
Is it stupid if I say, the barge is the first place I ever had friends?
[Because there's a dozen reasons, but that's the first one, that's the one that presses hardest against his ribs. Even if it sounds horribly childish, coming out of his mouth.]
Hannibal wasn't the worst thing that ever happened to me. Not even close, screw him. He's just - the thing I haven't figured out how to deal with yet. And the barge gave me a lot more than it cost. I know that's not - you, not a lot of people. But when I couldn't control my power....everything was, was falling apart, everything I tried to do turned out worse. The barge could make me helpless, but it could also hit pause on that. Let me breathe, let me learn.
And, also.
[His mouth quirks a little, helpless, chagrinned, because he is aware of the parallel -]
I am maybe a little bit hiding from my resurrected girlfriend. I mean, not hiding. I am giving her space. Since she's still fourteen, and I did technically kill her last month from her perspective, and also, can feel me from the other side of the planet.
[Resurrected and enraged at him for doing so, twenty four to his thirty. Finding her own feet in humanity, while he passes some time here to let her get some space, let himself grow.]
[He runs a hand through his hair, tries to figure out what he does mean, chews his lip for a second in frustration.]
I mean, jesus. I was a seventh grade drop-out. I don't know anything. I mean I read a lot, it helps having the cheat sheet for the universe on the backs of my eyelids but I don't - everything I ever say about what I can do, or what I am, it's 95% it just feels like that to me, and 5% someone else had a metaphor in their guess that sounded pretty good.
[He makes himself take a slow breath.]
I wouldn't know where to start, really. And if you don't want to, it's not like guessing hasn't worked out for me okay. But you're - rigorous. It might be good to - look at it that way. And it might be a fun project for you.
Oh Jesus, dude, yes. Of course. Study of small gods is legit a discipline where I come from. And I've killed two, I really should know more about it than I do. Let's figure you out.
[Not to murder him or anything, but on principle.]
Do you want to deal with the education thing? You've got the time now.
[Dryly, but he's not actually kidding. He's determined not to get prematurely maudlin about it, but he really doesn't want to live forever.]
I've done some. I've been on board almost two years, put together. And Doc- Doctor Banner and Doctor Cambridge trained me up to at least the equivalent of nursing certification. But I'm really bad at sticking to a curriculum on my own. The library has so much, you know? So...
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magician_king) wrote2020-01-12 01:19 pm
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Independently. They don't know one another.
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I'll need some time to work out how to say it without threats. Or at least without stupid ones.
[Dillon knows neither of them would take thatwell, either, but he also knows himself. If he tried to talk to them today, that's what would come out.]
Do you want me to be at the group when you are?
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Well. Are you a member of the fun trauma club?
[He asks, because;]
I'd like to have someone to sit with but I don't want to waste your time.
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I almost threw up last month when Odd made me a home-cooked breakfast. We talked before about - people that are real, in other worlds? We had a Hannibal Lecter on the ship, for a while. He had me for - most of a month. With my powers locked down just enough that he could do almost anything and I'd survive to feel it.
So.
I already promised Alec I'd go. But if you wanted - separate spaces, I don't know. I'd have skipped some for you.
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[Says Quentin, and doesn't over react, which is his gift. He sorts quietly through the implications thereof and bites his bottom lip, and decides;]
So you should come for sure. And I'll be relieved to have the company, personally.
But why are you back, knowing that all can happen?
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[Because there's a dozen reasons, but that's the first one, that's the one that presses hardest against his ribs. Even if it sounds horribly childish, coming out of his mouth.]
Hannibal wasn't the worst thing that ever happened to me. Not even close, screw him. He's just - the thing I haven't figured out how to deal with yet. And the barge gave me a lot more than it cost. I know that's not - you, not a lot of people. But when I couldn't control my power....everything was, was falling apart, everything I tried to do turned out worse. The barge could make me helpless, but it could also hit pause on that. Let me breathe, let me learn.
And, also.
[His mouth quirks a little, helpless, chagrinned, because he is aware of the parallel -]
I am maybe a little bit hiding from my resurrected girlfriend. I mean, not hiding. I am giving her space. Since she's still fourteen, and I did technically kill her last month from her perspective, and also, can feel me from the other side of the planet.
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[He says, faltering on that, because;]
Did Alice make it in my file?
[Resurrected and enraged at him for doing so, twenty four to his thirty. Finding her own feet in humanity, while he passes some time here to let her get some space, let himself grow.]
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Not, like, explicitly anybody's feelings about anything. But enough of what happened to put a picture together.
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[Something to fix wouldn't be enough, alone.]
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[There might be exceptions, but Dillon can't think of them off the top of his head. Except graduates, sort of, but that's a different situation.]
Also, this is kind of a personal sideline, but what are your thoughts on, uh, researching me?
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[Because Dillon sure as hell can't mean google.]
What do you need to know?
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[He runs a hand through his hair, tries to figure out what he does mean, chews his lip for a second in frustration.]
I mean, jesus. I was a seventh grade drop-out. I don't know anything. I mean I read a lot, it helps having the cheat sheet for the universe on the backs of my eyelids but I don't - everything I ever say about what I can do, or what I am, it's 95% it just feels like that to me, and 5% someone else had a metaphor in their guess that sounded pretty good.
[He makes himself take a slow breath.]
I wouldn't know where to start, really. And if you don't want to, it's not like guessing hasn't worked out for me okay. But you're - rigorous. It might be good to - look at it that way. And it might be a fun project for you.
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[Not to murder him or anything, but on principle.]
Do you want to deal with the education thing? You've got the time now.
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[Dryly, but he's not actually kidding. He's determined not to get prematurely maudlin about it, but he really doesn't want to live forever.]
I've done some. I've been on board almost two years, put together. And Doc- Doctor Banner and Doctor Cambridge trained me up to at least the equivalent of nursing certification. But I'm really bad at sticking to a curriculum on my own. The library has so much, you know? So...
[Help with that, maybe?]
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[He says, easily. That he can help with.]
And I'll design a protocol for figuring out what you are, what you can do, and why.
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Thank you.