IC INBOX for The Last Voyages

[magician_king]

You know what to do.

Comments

[magician_king]

With what- as in what was the curse? Why- as in what joke did you play? When was this?

[tetractys]

OH, HE ASKED IF ANYONE HAD KIDS AND I SAID THAT THAT HADN'T GONE SO WELL FOR HIM, HUH.

[magician_king]

What was the curse?

[tetractys]

I HAD A TEMPORARY CONSCIENCE!

[Bill frowns. It's bitter and distant, focused on something much older than the past two days.]

YEAH, I KNOW. BOO HOO, THE HUMAN CONDITION.

...I DON'T WANT IT HAPPENING AGAIN. IF YOU CAN RECOMMEND A BOOK, I'LL JUST TRY TO TEACH THE DUMB GENIUS SOME MAGIC RESISTANCE MYSELF.

[magician_king]

You say you want to get out of here, but you want to do it without developing a conscience?

[tetractys]

I KNOW THIS WHOLE SHIP IS BENT ON THE IDEA THAT I CAN'T GET OUT WITHOUT BEING BOTHERED BY THE FACT THAT I HAVE SOME PIECES MISSING. I'M SUPPOSED TO BE ASHAMED OF THAT! BUT I DIDN'T GET TO PICK THE WAY I THINK, I'VE JUST ALWAYS BEEN THIS WAY! MY ONLY CHOICE WAS WHETHER OR NOT I WAS GOING TO BE OKAY WITH IT.

IMAGINE GOING A TRILLION YEARS WITHOUT HATING YOURSELF AND THEN SUDDENLY UNDERSTANDING THAT YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN, AND THAT EVERYONE THAT WANTS YOU DEAD PROBABLY HAD A BETTER GRASP ON THE SITUATION THAN PEOPLE WHO WANT YOU ALIVE!

I'LL PASS ON ANOTHER ROUND!

[magician_king]

I want you alive. And having lived a few millenia, I think I have a better grasp on the situation than most.

But I definitely believe you could do a little more hating of the way you have sometimes behaved.

[tetractys]

YEAH, WELL, I'D BE DEAD BY NOW IF I HADN'T KILLED A BUNCH OF PEOPLE TO CLIMB THE LADDER. I WOULDN'T HAVE MET YOU, I WOULDN'T EVEN BE BILL, BECAUSE I ONLY TOOK THAT NAME LIKE TWO HUNDRED YEARS AGO.

I DON'T SEE ANY KIND OF POINT IN FEELING BAD ABOUT STUFF THAT I CAN'T DO ANYTHING ABOUT, AND THAT INCLUDES THE PAST!

[magician_king]

Well, that is something I'm sincerely sorry to hear.

[tetractys]

YEAH, WELL. ME TOO.

[magician_king]

So what the fuck is up with you and Ford?

[tetractys]

UGH, WHAT ISN'T UP?

THIS IS JUST THE LATEST IN A SERIES OF THINGS I HAVE TO DEAL WITH NOW! APPARENTLY HIS SAFETY IS MY SAFETY IN THE HANDS OF WHOEVER KNOWS HOW TO EXPLOIT THAT CONNECTION. I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHICH COMMON THREAD I'D NEED TO SEVER, AND IF IT WAS THE UNIVERSE SIGNATURE I'M OUT OF LUCK!

[magician_king]

Yeah, I would start there.

Who's your warden right now?

[tetractys]

LUKE SKYWALKER.

NICE KID! BRIGHTER THAN THE MOVIES MADE HIM LOOK.

[magician_king]

Ask him to ask the Admiral if he can sever you from Ford.

[tetractys]

HUH! YOU KNOW, I DON'T TRUST HIM, BUT IF HE MESSES IT UP THE WORST THAT CAN HAPPEN IS NOTHING!

YEAH, GOOD IDEA! I'LL TALK TO HIM. THANKS, Q!

[magician_king]

I mean, just be polite about it and make a strong case. Your being tangled up with that family seems like it's never been a good thing for you, and it'd probably help if you weren't.

[tetractys]

YEAH, YOU'D THINK I'D GET OUT WHILE THE GETTING WAS GOOD.

THERE'S A LOT OF DUMB PROPHECY STUFF INVOLVED. PROPHECIES ARE A TERRIBLE IDEA. WHATEVER HAPPENED TO FREE WILL, HUH?

[he loves prophecies about himself winning and hates all the ones about him being dead]