"No it isn't. It's an expression of vulnerability. If you articulate a need the other person has the chance to tell you it's inappropriate, or refuse to meet it."
This, he's learned over the years.
"They'll see into you, and that gives them power over you. It can be very humiliating."
"Okay. What about expressing it positively, then- finding the thing you like, and you feel is being threatened, and want more of- and going to him and asking for it. A lot of non-monogamous couples make agreements about a space that's just for them- or agree on a portion of their weekly calendar reserved for one another. Asked for, explicitly because 'you're important to me, I like that you're seeing other people, but I don't want to lose track of one another first and foremost.'"
"Expressing the way you really feel can make you vulnerable. And make you look desperate. What's more important to you- that you look cool, or that he knows he's admired, desired, and respected?"
"I went on national television to recommend androids over humans as sexual
partners," he points out, which is to say: "I have never once cared about
looking cool."
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timeasmymeasure
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Date: 2019-12-11 05:33 pm (UTC)"Where does trust come into it? Expressing one's needs is simply self-interest."
Please help this idiot.
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Date: 2019-12-11 05:35 pm (UTC)This, he's learned over the years.
"They'll see into you, and that gives them power over you. It can be very humiliating."
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Date: 2019-12-11 06:02 pm (UTC)"Rhys knows I wouldn't..."
Ah. That's trust.
"Hm. Regardless, I have no complaints about the arrangement as it stands. It's simply the transition period that's...slightly uncomfortable."
Eventually this will feel fine. Right?
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Date: 2019-12-11 06:04 pm (UTC)He urges, watching him work.
"He'd want to know."
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Date: 2019-12-11 06:08 pm (UTC)"No, he wouldn't. He'd overreact and feel embarrassed that he asked for this in the first place."
This is stated more as fact than conjecture.
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Date: 2019-12-11 06:11 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2019-12-11 06:19 pm (UTC)That sounds like a terrible idea because it involves acknowledging that we're a couple, Elijah does not say.
"...I'll give it further thought."
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Date: 2019-12-11 06:46 pm (UTC)In Quentin's slightly biased opinion.
"He saved my life the other day."
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Date: 2019-12-11 06:51 pm (UTC)"....He did?"
Elijah knows nothing about this; details, please.
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Date: 2019-12-11 06:53 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2019-12-11 06:54 pm (UTC)"...I'm glad you had someone to reach out to," he says, more diplomatically.
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Date: 2019-12-11 06:55 pm (UTC)Instructs Quentin, in case this wasn't clear.
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Date: 2019-12-11 06:59 pm (UTC)Elijah makes a noise, then works up to actual words.
"I don't see how that would make me look anything except desperate at this point."
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Date: 2019-12-11 07:02 pm (UTC)There are days where he can't have both.
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Date: 2019-12-11 07:03 pm (UTC)"I went on national television to recommend androids over humans as sexual partners," he points out, which is to say: "I have never once cared about looking cool."
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Date: 2019-12-11 07:04 pm (UTC)Pushing, just a little.
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Date: 2019-12-11 07:06 pm (UTC)"Because..."
He glares at a lightbulb for several moments.
"Because I don't know well enough to articulate it."
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Date: 2019-12-11 07:08 pm (UTC)He's got nowhere to be.
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Date: 2019-12-11 07:12 pm (UTC)"Quentin-"
He takes in a breath.
"I literally do not have the vocabulary for this."
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Date: 2019-12-11 07:13 pm (UTC)He insists, watching him.
"How has your life been improved by knowing Rhys?"
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Date: 2019-12-11 07:24 pm (UTC)"I don't feel comfortable rehearsing this with you," he says plainly, and descends the ladder to move it along the hallway.
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Date: 2019-12-12 01:01 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2019-12-12 08:30 am (UTC)"Frankly? Yes. But I can't imagine that you'd want to say to me what you plan on taking to your next conversation with Jedao," he says, bluntly.
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Date: 2019-12-12 08:33 am (UTC)So;
"Rehearsing this stuff is normal and healthy."
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Date: 2019-12-12 08:37 am (UTC)Elijah almost says something about needing to see his sources for that, but retreats up a ladder instead.
"Well, I wouldn't be any use regardless. I don't know him."
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